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Something about you seems different.
Off-kilter, in a way.
You don't look like you anymore.
Where's that beautiful smile?
The one I spent hours convincing you to show,
Because I loved it so much.
Where is your laughter?
It seems to be lost.
Laughter like yours,
Carefree and abundant,
Should never be lost.
You used to shine.
Happy and exuberant
You made everyone want to be around you
They always hoped a little bit of you would fall off
And rub onto them.
Where is your magic?
Your way of turning the crankiest person
In to a good mood.
I don't speak these questions out loud,
But you hear them nonetheless
And you seem to want to pretend I'm not there
By tearing your eyes away from mine
But we both know you still feel
The white-hot intensity of my gaze
Even though all the space and bodies between us
And in that moment, I know
I know that you know
That I've always known.
It's all an act
You may be able to fool everyone else,
But I've known you too long and too well
And I wonder then
Why you invited me here when you knew
That it would only take one glance for me
To know that the smile plastered on your face
Was fake
It didn't quite reach your eyes.
The laughter coming out of you
Was forced
Too deep and too throaty to be real
To be yours.
And then I see you turn around and walk toward me.
Hope, of all things
Shining in those gorgeous eyes.
And that's when I realize
Why the invitation to your wedding
Came to my door
I embrace you before quickly pulling away.
And in that embrace
All the reasons why I ever loved you come back and strangle me in a rush.
And leave just as quickly.
And if your sharp intake of breath is any indication,
It happened to you too.
Then i step away.
And it is with real sorrow and regret
That I softly tell you
That it isn't my job
To save you from yourself
Not anymore.
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